Quick turn on the lights.

Isn't it funny how the polticians all come out when they want something from you.

And on this occasion, they forget their differences for a cup of manky coffee in dundrum shopping centre.
I'm sure I could quite easily relate this to meeting the Leader of the opposition walking down the main street in Goulburn the other day. It was the opening of the largest waste incinerator in Australia that day.
Rubbish!

Don't let your nan go down for murder!

Today I was checking out the avon and somerset police website.
I needed information on getting a piece of paper for the Australian Visa people which confirms my non-criminal status.
While checking around the site, I found the following gem...

So Wise Up! And don't let your nan go down for murder!

Beat me baby

So today I found out that if K_ ever has enough of me, I'll have to ask her to beat me so I don't get thrown out of the country.

Let me explain.

I'm applying for a spousal visa with K_, we're in a defacto relationship.
When I apply for the visa, I get a temporary 820 Visa. When immigration check up on us two years later, if we're togeather I get permenant residency, if not, I get evicted & deported.

UNLESS...
Katherine beats me, and I can prove that I am the victim of maritial violence.
Then, if these circumstances are the reason for our breakup, I may be allowed to contunue reside in the country.

I understand that this provision is for the protection of people in a relationship with their Visa sponsor. But wouldn't it be open to abuse?

Attack of the Arachnoid

So, today I was bringing my bike down into the celler, when I met someone in the garage.
A HUGE spider! I opened the door, and he winked at me and asked me how I was doing.

So being naturally scared of anything that casts a shadow, as all good irishmen are, I took a photo and legged it. It was the size of my hand!! Well half the size! Well it was the biggest bloody spider I ever saw.
And when my lovely girlfriend got home, she informed me that this was a Sydney funnel web spider, a type of tarantula, and ONE OF THE MOST VENOMOUS spiders in Australia.
Nice, I've been here a month, and the first australian animal I find, is one of the ones that can kill ye!
Lets see how long I last. Maybe the next one will be a redback.
In other news, today I found out that New Zealand apparantly has no snakes, hmm...

Lovedale long luncheon

So the weekend was spent doing something that katherine and I have after 1 month in Australia, only just found time for...
Relaxing.
Well, we tried to relax, but it wasn't as easy as we had thought. Both of us had a shocking case of the flu mixed with encroaching chest infections. And there were 10 other mad eijits, mates, friends and accomplices from katherines band of friends travelling with us.
Still, fun was had and a select few will be able to see more than this little pic.

Yeah Connected Again!

Just a quick word to say...
We have Moved into an apartment of our own! Now we have a considerable amount of room!
Internet is connected... now to get the rest done.

The proof is in the pudding.

Here's further proof, that the road rage problem is definitely out of control.
Idiot driver, worries a pack of professional and semi-profesional cyclists, then overtakes and emergency breaks in front of them with a shit eating "I Think I'm so funny" grin on his face. Now he's claiming he had engine trouble...
Yeah, the engine trouble was caused by the dick in the driver seat. Man, people like this make me mad.
I did't beleive what I had been told before I came here, cyclists are pelted with eggs, stones, cans, abuse. They are squeezed of the Road by cars, and BUSES! Overtaking cars pull in on cyclists to knock them of balance.
Unfortunatly it's all true.

I think it's an ingrained problem in the driver psyche in Sydney. The roads are hostile for car users, never mind cyclists and motorbikes. Most cars would cut you to pieces to gain a 20 metre advantage to the next red light. The lanes are too narrow for a normal car. The intersections are inconsistanly laid out. None of the traffic lights are intelligently controlled. The roads are uneven, potholed and inappropriatly cambered. Everybody wants a V6 muscle engine, regardless of piece of shite car it's attached to. How do you change a nation, grown up with traffic like this. It's like dublin, but 3 times the size, and 3 times the idiots.

I don't know what else to say, except, I don't have any idea how to solve this probem without confronting every crazy driver individually.

Getting a Flat in Sydney

Right, so we probably have a flat sorted. So here's my guide to getting a flat in Sydney.

1. Figure out where, transport is difficult in Sydney, get near the trains & Buses
2. Check the Websites, Domain, myhome.com.au, rent.com.au, realestate.com.au, HomeHound & TradingPost.
3. Visit the Estate Agent personally, and ask about upcoming properties. You can get the inside info on not yet published properties.
4. Dress well, before meeting any estate or rental agent. They make alot of snap judgements, and first impressions count.
5. Don't look foreign. Sorry but it's true, I was amazed at the engrained racism of the Rental agents we dealt with. They were openly dismisive of non-white european candidates, even if the agent themselves fell into this catagory. (A self fulfilling engrained racism that I will get back to at another post.)
6. Saterday is Viewing day. Most properties are viewed in the morning on Sat & Sun, it's the time with the best lighting and least traffic/transport noise. Plan your viewing.
7. View every property possible, even if it's only to get an Idea of what properties are worth, and what the standard state of the properties is. Damp & mould are standard in the housing thrown up in sydney in the 90's. Don't be scared of by this, it's mostly cosmetic, it can be dealt with using appropriate Airing.
8. Ground floor = Easy to break into. Australian apartments get a security rating of -1 from me. The only limiting factor for a thief appears to be getting a parking space for the getaway van.
9. If you REALLY are sure about an apartmetn, then try to gently coerce rental agents to let you view apartments on your own. This uses up alot of their time, but many are willing if they expect you to take the property, it saves them organizing a public viewing.
10. Be prepared. You could be knocked back, or put on the spot. Don't make snap decisions (Thanks K!) about you accomodation, you will regret it. If you're waiting for an approval for an apartment, prepare the Deposit & Keep an eye on the upcoming properties incase it doesn't work out.
11. Presentation is No 1. If you dress well, and act professional, and have security, then the agent will put your application forward. If you turn up with bed head, trackies and a mouth full of gum, your application will land straight in the bin.

Good luck, and suggestions are welcome.